Wednesday, February 2, 2011

bigger and better

we have move!! to

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

first place on my map

in another 24 hours, i will be in the airport. 6 more hours to that, i will reach Philippines. add a day or so, i be enjoying the island, deep down under the sea, 18m and in the dark. thrilling. creatures of the dark and 18 m under. how many people could proudly claim that? ok. probably a lot. it will be the start of my journey. my true journey. since graduation, i always dream of being a freelancer, breaking the 9-5. not being a monkey in a cubicle prisoner. nimble limbs being shackled, with just 90 cm2 moving space. Earth, Terra, total surface area of 510,072,000 km2. The land surface area, even at a small percentage of 29.2%, makes up 148,940,000 km2. 148,940,000 km2 vs 90cm2. isn't it obvious what i will choose? when you confined yourself in a smaller area, you don't get yourself moving. if instead you were given even 10 km2, i believe you would just go wild.

13th to 18th. not exactly a long break just a short getaway. give myself time to rethink about my path. now, i am presented with this opportunity. To take it, i probably have to give up on my full 6 months travel in NZ. i'm still going even if it just a month. i'm still going to set up an earning blog. i'm still moving towards my dreams.  i'm not giving up, just being spontaneous. thats the beauty of one way ticket. you don't give yourself deadlines, you don't give yourself any restrictions, you don't have to be stunned by changes. no, i am not over-glorifying things. i am looking into my account and shaking my head. however in the next few months, i am going to fill it in with perseverance and passion. two things at a time. call me greedy, call me insane but i will prove it to you guys that it works.

till then, i would just take this break to rethink about my journey. enjoy life and perhaps fall in love screaming, "Maganda Puerto Galera! Mahal kita"

Thursday, January 6, 2011

a better organisation

i guess it is time that priorities shift.

i couldn't exchange more of my time for money anymore. i couldn't foresee myself down the road this way in the next few years. i have never been able to strive on uniformity. i could not survive under the hierarchy of organization. that much i know. to me, its just not ethical that the top dogs are earning all the money and paying the workers peanuts. its just like the scenario of those big companies setting up a base in the third world countries. its selfish, organisation like this. thats how everybody get trap in the poverty cycle, nobody could ever generate enough income to be self sustainable.

now that situation permits me to have a glimpse to a money spinning way, i have taken the leap. i have no idea if i will continue falling or be given solid ground to step on. perhaps, better still, i will be given wings. sometimes in life, we have to make a decision like this, to outperform ourselves. i have faith in myself that i will be able to achieve prosperity.

imagine having the financial power to do whatever you like. to achieve control. to reach retirement by the age of 30. i am still young, i got to fight it out. this is not just a greenhorn speaking out loud about life and its pipe dreams. its about youth, vigor and energy painting out a glamorous future. i hope this much determination could bring me to a greater height and making my parents proud. its possible.

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

a little insight about motivation

they all came and realise it is is not that easy. of course it is not that easy. what do they expect life to be? without challenges, all so smooth flowing, that would be a bland life wouldn't it-everything going your way? there bound to be restrictions. brick walls are there to differentiate the ones who really want it from those that just simply hope they were lucky enough to pass through. no denial luck do play a part.

i am not going to stop here, facing this huge wall you place nonchalantly. bruises, cut and blood all over me. i have come this far. people are amazed, i know i can continue to push myself to a greater height. dreams are sacred but not esoteric. dreams are meant to be fulfilled and not forgotten in the silence of the day. so much i have said, but i still see regrets among others rising. everything, every decision, there is a lesson to be learned, there are no regrets, just detour in my life. long paths taken but i won't think about the road not tread. trail blazer, no perhaps not that unique. i just hate to follow suit.

people say i am motivated but little did they know how impress i am by their choice of lifestyle. to be able to survive in a monotonous dread, a mundane life. i would never be able to pull that off. an average human seeks for new expeiences. i really admire those who could live their days an exact replica to the other days. they are extraordinary.

if you do something you love, it just takes very little motivation as you are intrinsically driven. however, if you are doing something you hate, i believe it take more motivation as you feel dejected constantly. so now could you see who is the superhuman now? its actually the conformist themselves, with their steel will and mind. they have the strength to disagree and turn back from their inner self in order to receive adulation from others. i never find myself succumbing to that.

i have to confess. forgive me for being so weak. i couldn't resist my inner voice, or call it temptations if it makes you feel better. perhaps, i am motivate by selfishness. i am sorry.

i forgive myself, i hope you do too. 

Monday, January 3, 2011

jane goodall

she is beautiful. even at this age.

2011. are you going to make it different from 2010?

A new year. a great start. new dreams. continuation of plans. 2011 spells a great year of opportunity for me. changes have occurred and i called that growth. i'm on a trajectory, whereby hopefully i would end on the intended place. even if i don't. it would be a good life experience.


just before the year end, the interviewee looked at my results and offhandedly claimed, you are a brilliant young girl, aren't you. i sneered. merits, they termed it.

i am by no mean brilliant, and no amount of grades could testify against it. no i am not ridiculing the education system. i always believe if you find your way to study and work hard at it, you bound to get good results. of course there are geniuses in this world who is just born with more gray matter. but if you belong to the same group as me, the average person with average number of gray matter. imagine this, each day you wake up and study, sleep. wake up and study. sleep. don't tell me all the information is not going to get inside your head. it will go inside. trust me. and viola. you will get good results the next semester. the only variable is probably your talent. but talent without hard-work is not going further than hard-work without talent. i believe talent only shorten the time duration needed. all and all, it still take around 10,000 (or is it 100,000?) hours to master something.

it is wrong for our society to place people in forms of grade. however that is the easiest measurable way to do it. people are always looking for short cuts. you could be in some scholarship list yet commit adultery or child porn as long as you are smart enough to keep it under wraps. people are born to be different, they still don't realise how grave it is to categorise people using this one system. we are not a string that could be measured just by stretching ourselves against a ruler.

some of us are born to be artists, some athletics, some dancers, some models, some designers, some psychics and others to so many more than my imagination could cook up.  but education has to put us into a box claiming, "oh, this is to be a scientist, a businessman, an accountant, or worse, a lowly-wage worker." nobody wants that. to be jeered at for their life choice. even if you are going to make a breakthrough, you are bound to pass by this stage of ostracizing and being scorned at. there used to be this period of time whereby scientist that name animals and giving them a personality is being termed as moron (or some what likely). but see how the mentality shifted? from basic instinct, non-thinking moving organism to feeling and thinking animals that have a heart and even more developed senses (the sixth sense) than human. and some even believe that animals are more connected to the world. i am a supporter of this belief.

visualize this, the optimum world with a balanced and holistic education in opposition to our suppressed, grades revolving, limited view education. which one do you prefer? its a long way to the former but i believe things will take a better turn.

i don't want any more labels. i want people to see me as a special entity and respect my decision like how i do with others. the right and wrong of one (as long as it doesn't hurt another person physically) could only be judged by themselves.

Saturday, December 25, 2010

today is the day i will say goodbye

today is not a good day to talk because

today i cried the whole day;
today i walked in the rain and  you will think that it is insensible;
today i haven't think of how to start the topic;
today not everybody will be there to listen;
today you wouldn't be in the mood to hear me out.

today will not be a good day, maybe tomorrow i will be better prepared.
the tomorrow that i am ready for the worst will never come.
everyday will be a today, thats all i know

and i want you to know, if not today, then when?