Tuesday, July 28, 2009

道(chi:dao jap:do)
definition: way
more appropriately interpreted as:
1) the way of breathing spirit into form ("newborn")
2) the way of guiding spirit out of form (afterlife)

this 道 has been in my mind for the whole of today, i have to write it down, record it somewhere and decipher it furthur. it has intrigued me today when i read up on one article about it. and furthur reinforced by the encounter on sunday when i went to this house temple. let just say the sunday experience was antagonizing and counter-productive with pushy preachers. the dao that they seek is revolving around guiding spirit out of the body correctly upon death.

the dao that i am more interested is the way of giving life to a form. i was wondering what is the point of attaining enlightenment in the afterlife when we, contradicting humans, stress upon where to go on a usual, normal sunday, not to mention even for a meal. yes, i am fascinated by how religion could be a mental support for so many people. and its even more stimulating how when some people say, "i know god must have something else in place for me".(just a small percentage of time though) so it means every moment in our life is predestined, and we, being the vulnerable, have no power and strength to defy it? yet so many great people in history have proved that, we, human beings, are strong-willed and possessed all ability to be in control of our life, to be the master of our fate. and what worth is belief, if we just leave everything to their natural flow? we should be acting with the force of nature, not let nature execute its act. can u imagine the world now if everybody only adopted faith in some external power and not take a leap of faith on their very own abilities? shouldnt we grow and learn from our mistake instead of succumbing to our failure?

maybe i did not know the teachings of the religion accurately and/or well enough to make these comments and i definitely hope that religious people would not take any offence. i have a religion too, in name not by faith, determined by birth not by choice. i dont really believe in their existence, just not yet. maybe someday i will embrace them, even to the extent of offering my soul(ok thats sound unorthodox, perhaps just my choice of lifestyle), but just not now.

haha.. i think i have digressed but my stand is, what is the point of learning to guide the spirit upon death when life itself is just a form with the spirit locked up. (ok, so this might only applies to me, since i think i the only one who feel that i just living life for the sake of living it) so our spirirt could only be truly unleashed when death looms? all this while, i felt my life has just been taking form of what people perceive as the "way". to study, to perform academically, to grow up, to get a good job, to have immense fortune, and to retire. cannot deny there are fun times but other than that i just felt trap, felt like there is something out there that i should seek, felt like i should break free, and it definitely felt like i have the choice of spreading my wings. or should i just continue on this well-paved route that so many people have travelled effortless (relatively) and few have fell? there is no hidden traps, no dangers lurking in some corner. but the alternative path, which might have been strewn with all kind of mysterious/evil/dangerous power, deserves it attention too.

am i to work then enjoy? or am i qualified to enjoy work life?
am i to follow? or am i the one to pursue?
am i to run on the ground? or am i the chosen one to fly?
am i to wait for my prince and live "happily ever after"? or am i prepared to set off for the quest of my life?
am i to submit a neat white sheet of report on my life? or am i branded as the creative one to produce multiple colourful sheets?
am i to settle down with expectations of others? or am i capable to fufil my dreams?

the choice is clear but the path is obscure
the goal is set but resistance will be strong
though so, i will thrive
even if it means to explore a path unknown
even if everyone else think its absurb
even if i am the only one consent to it
this life of mine needs some revolution
and it wont go hand in hand with the tradition
someday i will free that spirit
and u shall see
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